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Big Key, Little Door
Loquat
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[ti:Trapped In The Drive-Thru] [ar:Yankovic] [al:Straight Outta Lynwood] [by: ] [00:00.83]9ku.com 制作 [00:07.07]Album:Straight Outta Lynwood [00:09.65]Yankovic-Trapped In The Drive-Thru [00:12.53] [00:21.91]Seven O'Clock in the evening [00:23.45]Watchin somethin' stupid on TV [00:25.09]I'm zoned out on the sofa [00:27.38]When my wife comes in the room and sees me [00:30.26] [00:30.47]She says "Is this 'Behind the Music' [00:33.55]With Lynard Skynard?" [00:34.90]And I say "I don't know. [00:36.49]Say, it's gettin' late...watcha wanna do for dinner? [00:40.06] [00:40.52]She says "I kinda had a big lunch. [00:41.62]So I'm not super hungry." [00:44.56]I said "Well you know, baby, I'm not starvin' either [00:46.73]But I could eat." [00:47.72] [00:48.08]She said "So whadya have in mind?" [00:49.85]I said "I don't know what about you?" [00:52.19]She said "I don't care, if you're hungry, let's eat." [00:54.89]I said "That's what we're gonna do!" [00:56.36] [00:56.75]"But first you gotta tell me [00:58.41]What it is you're hungry for!" [01:00.57]And she says "Let me think... [01:02.89]...What's left in our refridgerator?" [01:04.93] [01:05.80]I said "Well, there's tuna, I know." [01:07.66]She said "That went bad a week ago!" [01:09.94]I said "Is the chili OK?" [01:12.04]She said "You finished that yesterday!" [01:14.26] [01:14.77]I hopped up and I said [01:16.42]"I don't know, do you want to get something delivered?" [01:18.73]She's like "Why would I want to eat liver? [01:21.64]I don't even like liver!" [01:23.53] [01:23.86]I'm like "No, I said 'delivered'." [01:26.23]She's like "I heard you say liver!" [01:27.91]I'm like "I should know what I said..." [01:29.89]She's like "Whatever, I just don't want any liver!" [01:32.09] [01:32.53]Well I was gonna say something [01:34.39]But my cell phone started to ring [01:36.61]Now who could be callin' me? [01:38.60]Well I checked my caller ID [01:40.73] [01:41.15]It was just cousin Larry [01:42.94]Callin' for the third time today... [01:44.83]My wife said "Let it go to voicemail." [01:47.92]I said, "OK." [01:49.46] [01:50.21]"Where were we? Oh, Dinner, Right [01:52.27]So what d'ya want to do?" [01:53.96]She said "Why don't you whip up somethin in the kitchen?" [01:56.44]"Yeah," I said, "Why don't you?" [01:58.54] [01:59.03]And then she said "Baby, can't we just go out to dinner, please?" [02:02.87]I says "No" [02:03.71]She says "Yes" [02:04.13]I says "No" [02:04.60]She says "Yes" [02:05.12]I says "No" [02:05.62]She says "Yes... [02:06.35]...Oh, here's your keys" [02:08.00] [02:08.21]I step a little bit closer [02:09.95]Say "OK, where ya want to go?" [02:11.86]She says "How about The Ivy?" [02:14.15]I said "Yeah, well I don't know..." [02:16.25] [02:16.70]I don't feel like gettin all dressed up [02:19.19]And eatin' expensive food [02:20.96]She's says "Olive Garden?" [02:23.05]I say "Nah, I'm not in the mood... [02:25.13] [02:25.52]...And Burrito King would make me gassy [02:28.22]There's no doubt" [02:29.57]She says "Just forget about it" [02:31.81]I said "No, I swear I'm gonna take you out!" [02:33.95] [02:34.55]Then I get an idea [02:36.65]I says "I know what we'll do!" [02:38.75]She says "What?" [02:39.50]I say "Guess" [02:39.74]She says "What?" [02:40.22]I say "We're goin' to the drive-thru!" [02:42.98] [02:43.49]So we head out the front door [02:45.11]Open the garage door [02:47.55]Then I open the car doors [02:49.97]And we get in those car doors [02:51.86] [02:52.31]Put my key in the ignition [02:53.99]And then I turn it sideways [02:56.21]Then we fasten our seat belts [02:58.40]As we pull out the driveway [03:00.81] [03:01.17]Then we drive to the drive-thru [03:02.91]Heading off to the drive-thru [03:05.13]We're approaching the drive-thru [03:07.32]Getting close to the drive-thru! [03:09.42] [03:09.81]Almost there at the drive-thru [03:11.70]Now we're here at the drive thru [03:13.83]Here in line at the drive-thru [03:16.08]Did I mention the drive-thru? [03:18.39] [03:27.67]Well here we are [03:29.19]In the drive-thru line, me and her. [03:31.71]Cars in front of us, cars in back of us. [03:34.68]All just waiting to order [03:36.04] [03:36.45]There's some idiot in a Volvo [03:38.19]With his brights on behind me [03:40.39]I lean out the window and scream [03:42.45]"Hey, Whatcha tryin to do, blind me?" [03:45.16] [03:45.54]My wife says "Maybe we should park... [03:47.56]...We could just go eat inside." [03:49.66]I said "I'm wearin' bunny slippers [03:51.91]So I ain't leavin' this ride..." [03:54.13] [03:54.39]Now a woman on a speaker box [03:56.52]Is sayin' "Can I take your order, please?" [03:58.59]I said "Yes indeed, you certainly can [04:00.51]We'd like two hamburgers with onions and cheese." [04:02.82] [04:03.10]Then my wife says [04:04.62]"Baby, hold on, I've changed my mind! [04:07.26]I think I'm gonna have a chicken sandwich [04:10.17]Instead, this time" [04:11.47] [04:12.09]I said "You always get a cheeseburger!" [04:13.80]She says "That's not what I'm hungry for." [04:16.11]I put my head in my hands and screamed, [04:18.33]"I don't know who you are anymore!" [04:20.65] [04:21.12]The voice on the speaker says [04:22.84]"I don't have all day!" [04:25.12]I said "Then, take our order, [04:26.94]And we'll be on our way! [04:29.56] [04:29.95]I wanna get a chicken sandwich [04:31.99]And I want a cheeseburger, too [04:34.09]She's like "You want onions on that?" [04:36.22]I'm like "Yeah, I already said that I do... [04:38.29] [04:38.65]...Plus we need curly fries [04:40.62]And don't you dare forget it! [04:43.14]And two medium root beers [04:45.49]No, just one, we'll split it." [04:47.65] [04:48.00]Then I said "I'm guessin' that [04:49.69]You're probably not too bright... [04:52.03]So read me back my order [04:54.16]Let's make sure you got it right." [04:56.02] [04:56.25]She says "One, you want a chicken sandwich. [04:58.51]Two, you want a cheeseburger [05:00.54]Three, curly fries, and a large root beer" [05:03.72]"Stop, don't go no further!" [05:05.20] [05:05.49]"I never ordered a large rootbeer [05:07.36]I said medium, not large!" [05:09.16]Then she says "We're havin' a special, [05:11.83]I supersized you at no charge." [05:13.87] [05:14.17]"Oh." And that's all [05:16.91]I could say, was "Oh." [05:18.11]And she says "Now there is somethin' else [05:20.24]That I really think you should know. [05:22.43] [05:22.94]You can have unlimited refills [05:24.86]For just a quarter more..." [05:26.78]I say "Great, except we're in the drive thru... [05:29.36]So what would I want that for?" [05:31.19] [05:31.61]Then she says "Wait a minute [05:33.62]Your voice sounds so familiar...hey, is this Paul? [05:36.77]And my wife is all like "No, that ain't Paul, [05:39.41]Now tell me, who's this Paul? [05:41.25] [05:41.75]She says "Oh, he's just some guy [05:43.58]Who goes to school with me. [05:45.68]I sat behind him last year [05:47.81]And I copied off him in Geometry. [05:50.93]I said "I know a guy named Paul. [05:52.59]He used to be my plumber [05:54.72]He was prematurely bald [05:56.94]And he moved to Pittsburgh last summer. [05:59.07] [05:59.22]He also had bladder problems [06:01.35]And a really bad infection on his toe." [06:03.24]And she said "Mister, please, you can stop right there, [06:06.01]That's way more than I needed to know!" [06:07.86] [06:08.14]And then we both were quiet [06:10.24]And things got real intense [06:12.46]Then she says "Next window please, [06:14.47]That'll be five dollars and eighty two cents." [06:16.81] [06:17.01]So we inched ahead in line [06:19.00]Movin' painfully slow [06:20.98]I got a little bored [06:23.11]So I turned on the radio... [06:24.91] [06:25.34][Song plays] [06:37.91] [06:41.79][Click] Turned it off [06:42.93]Because my wife was getting a headache [06:45.42]So we both just sat there quietly [06:49.39]For her sake. [06:50.49] [06:50.94]Then I looked at her [06:52.15]And she looked back at me [06:54.46]And I said "Um, [06:56.46]I think you have somethin' in your teeth." [06:58.86] [06:59.44]She turned away from me [07:01.11]And then turned back and said "Did I get it?" [07:03.63]I said "Yeah. Well, I mean, most of it... [07:06.87]But hey, ya know, don't sweat it." [07:08.67] [07:08.94]Then she said "How about now?" [07:11.70]I said "Yeah, almost. [07:13.00]There's still a little bit there [07:15.18]But don't worry, it's probably just a piece of toast." [07:17.31] [07:17.53]Now we're at the pay window [07:19.00]Or whatever you call it [07:21.21]Put my hand in my pocket [07:23.20]I can't believe there's no wallet! [07:25.42] [07:33.19]And the lady at the window's like, [07:34.38]"Well, well that'll be five eighty two." [07:38.53]I turn around to my wife, and say [07:41.40]"How much have you got on you?" [07:43.47] [07:44.16]She just rolls her eyes and says [07:45.87]"I'll pay for this, I guess." [07:48.04]So she reaches into her purse [07:49.98]And pulls out the American Express [07:52.44] [07:52.65]I hand it to the lady [07:54.54]And she says "Oh, dear. [07:56.64]It's gotta be cash only [07:58.89]We don't take credit cards here." [08:01.17] [08:01.45]I took back the card and said [08:03.42]"Gee, really? Well that sucks." [08:05.47]And that's when I found out [08:07.80]My wife was only carryin' three bucks. [08:10.18] [08:10.36]I said "I thought you were [08:12.46]Going to hit the ATM today" [08:15.19]She says "I never got around to it [08:17.43]So where's your wallet anyway? [08:18.94] [08:19.48]And I said "Nevermind, [08:20.92]Just help me to find some change..." [08:23.20]Now the lady at the window [08:25.17]Is lookin at me kinda strange... [08:27.46] [08:28.17]And she says "Mister, please, [08:30.04]We gotta move this line along" [08:32.32]I said "Now hold your stinkin' horses lady, [08:35.53]We won't be long." [08:36.85] [08:37.12]We looked around inside the glove-box [08:39.07]And check the mat beneath my feet [08:41.53]I found a nickel in the ashtray [08:43.24]And a couple pennies and a dime in the space betweent he seats [08:45.52] [08:45.82]Before long I had a little pile [08:47.80]Of coins of every sort [08:50.17]The lady counts it up and says [08:52.30]"You're still about a dollar short" [08:54.28] [08:54.70]And now my woman's got this weird look [08:56.92]Frozen on her face [08:58.54]She screams, "you know [09:00.34]I wasn't even really hungry in the first place" [09:03.25] [09:03.61]And so I turned around [09:05.35]To the cashier again [09:07.63]I shrugged and said "OK [09:09.79]Forget the chicken sandwich then" [09:12.05] [09:12.38]So I pick up my change [09:14.41]Pick up my reciept [09:16.40]And I drive to the pickup window [09:18.52]Man, I just can't wait to eat [09:20.68] [09:21.20]And now we see this acne ridden [09:23.20]Kid about sixteen [09:25.12]Wearin' a dorky nametag that says [09:27.80]"Hello, my name is Eugene." [09:29.72] [09:30.07]And he hands me a paper bag [09:32.23]I look him in the eyes [09:34.36]And I say to him "Hey, Eugene, [09:36.92]Can I get some ketchup for my fries?" [09:38.77] [09:38.95]Well he looks at me [09:40.90]And I look at him [09:43.34]And he looks at me [09:45.25]And I look at him [09:47.86] [09:48.22]And he looks at me [09:50.35]And I look at him [09:52.43]And he says "I'm sorry [09:54.13]What did you want again?" [09:56.45] [09:56.77]I say "Ketchup!" [09:58.43]And he says "Oh yeah, that's right... [10:01.13]...I just spaced out there for a second [10:03.26]I'm really kind of burnt tonight." [10:05.27] [10:05.66]And then he hands me the ketchup [10:07.85]And now we're finally drivin' away [10:10.32]And the food is drivin' me mad [10:12.73]With its intoxicating bouquet [10:14.98] [10:15.70]I'm starvin' to death [10:17.20]By the time we pull up at the traffic light [10:19.21]I say "Baby, gimme that burger, [10:22.07]I just gotta have a bite!" [10:23.99] [10:24.34]So she reaches in the bag [10:26.20]And pulls out the burger [10:28.49]And she hands me the burger [10:30.35]And I pick up the burger [10:32.33] [10:32.63]And then I unwrap the paper [10:35.30]I bite into those buns [10:37.77]And I just can't believe it [10:39.83]They forgot the onions! [10:44.42]
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